One World

Did anyone get a load of Extreme Home Make Over last night? WOW! It was a tearjerker.  Not only did this family have a young son in a wheelchair but the father, who is a local former high school football hero turned high school football coach, has been stricken with ALS. Married to his high school sweetheart his speech was beginning to slur and his fingers curled in atrophy. It brought back a lot of memories of my husband’s dad, Kess, who after a seven year battle, died of the same disease. His legacy lives on though. Before he died he established the Kessenich Family MDA/ALS Center at the University of Miami. The center is an amazing place for medical research and for families who are dealing with what is essentially a death sentence to come and find support and resources that help them get through a sad and frightening time. Kess’s children, family and friends continue to support the center and the doors are still open ten years after Kess has been gone, through generous donations from people who loved him. He instilled in everyone to keep fighting the fight, never give up and keep the center open to help other patients and their families. 

Charity begins at home. I thought with shows like Extreme Makeover and movies like The Blind Side, that it was pretty mainstream that we have to carry each other. I had a funny,(funny strange not ha-ha), experience picking my daughter up at a friend’s house yesterday.

Lovely home, seemingly lovely people. Kids are kind of spoiled but whatever. I think people, in general, try to keep the balance between a nice life and a spoiled one from happening to our kids but, let’s face it, most kids we know today have it pretty easy. So although I don’t agree with spoiled, I understand how it can happen, parents mean well. I have always tried to maintain for my children what my parents said to me, if your friends said lets jump off the Brooklyn Bridge would you do it? I never understood it at the time but I laugh to myself when I hear their words coming out of my mouth repeating the sentiment and look at their puzzled faces. I know, I know, someday you’ll get it.

So I pick my kid up and this mom comes out of her house and starts asking me why my other daughter is not returning to the school next year. I politely say the usual things when you are delicately trying to tell someone why the school they chose for their child is not the school you want for yours, (which by the way, who cares! If it’s right for you be happy with your decision!) “We moved here at an awkward time. She wants to go to school that has a better program for her sport. Her older brother is there.” Yada, yada…

 The mom then says, “I have been looking into other schools myself.” “REALLY?” I respond sitting up in my seat, thinking we are about to bond with what is REALLY the heart of the matter. (That I kind of think that the majority of the people at this school just don’t quite ‘get it’.) “Yes, now tell me if I am missing something but, why do we have so many scholarship kids at this school? Do we pay the high cost of tuition for these kids to come to our school? What is the deal? Shouldn’t we have the best of everything for our own kids before we start paying for kids who quite frankly, if they cant afford it, they shouldn’t be there.”

I stared at her with my mouth agape for a few seconds before I can recover enough to respond, “Well, I think the mission statement of the school is integrity, responsibility, character, community.” She then said, “What does any of that have to do with charity?” Holy mother of God, what did she just say? I tried to explain that we are all members of the community and it is our job to help people who are less fortunate than our selves to have a better life. (The same conversation I had with each of my kids before they went to Nursery school) She said, “Well, I guess your nicer than me!” then she looked across the front seat at my daughter who had spent the day at her house and said, “Thanks for coming over sweetie!” and we pulled away. (I tried not to screech the tires but I may have a little bit).

You can imagine my relief when my 12 year old looked at me and said, “Did she just say what I think she said?? We shouldn’t help people make a better life for themselves?” she asked sounding as dumbfounded as I felt.

Relief flooded through me as I said, “WOW! Yes, that is what she just said!!” Good thing we left, I thought she was going to ask me to go to the local school for the blind and move the furniture around. Unbelievable!

My daughter looked at me in bewilderment. Her eyes pleading to understand. I could not help her out. This is the kid who organized a book drive for Little Flower Children’s Services at her school in the 4^th grade. The kid who has seen her little friends donate their hair to Locks for Love since 1^st grade! She has raced for a cure, baked cookies for a cause, she ‘get’s it’. We raise them with the ideal that it is your civic duty to help your neighbors and fellow man make a better life for them selves, and in turn your life will be better for it. Community service has been a constant in our lives and the lives of our friends and family.  (I wonder if I should add this woman’s name to the list of friends and family who support The Kess center?)

I started to realize that, although thankfully, not the norm for our world, this person could quite possibly represent a large portion of how people think.

When we all understand that if our neighbor is moving in a positive direction and living a happy and more fulfilled life then we all will be. We are only as good as our community. It really is One World and as Bono and Mary J Blige say, we have to carry each other.